I JUST RECALLED WHAT SHUTS DOWN THE EXUBERANCE ENERGY AND CONFIDENCE OF THE LIVE ROCK PERFORMER.
THE CREATION OF WORRY, AND THE FEELING OF BEING WATCHED AND PROBED TO EXPOSE SOME DEFECT AND HAVING ONE'S MOTIVATION AND ONE'S DEDICATION AND PROFICIENCY AND EVEN ONE'S VERACITY AND SANITY QUESTIONED SAPS THE ENERGY AND BRAVADO OF THE LIVE ROCK PERFORMER.
WHEN I WAS AT MY PEAK IN CONFIDENCE AND IN PROFICIENCY THE ASSOCIATED CHEER AND ENERGY WAS MIS-CHARACTERIZED AS SOME LACK OF CONTROL OR LACK OF DECORUM OR LACK OF A REALISTIC OUTLOOK.
THEN THE FAMILY FELT ENTITLED TO STEAL FROM ME TO FORCE ME TO LABOR AT THEIR ONEROUS TASKS AND THEN OUTRAGED, THE FAMILY OF NARCISSISTS PHYSICALLY ATTACKED ME AND THEY DREW THE ATTENTION OF THE POLICE TO ME AND MY EX-WIFE AND HER LAWYER TRIED TO HAVE POLICE SEIZE MY GOODS AND MY MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS AND MY HOUSE AND STUDIO. THE DEFAMATION SPREAD AND OTHER PERSONS MADE THINGS UP ABOUT ME AND SENT DOGCATCHERS AND SHERIFFS AND BY-LAW OFFICERS OUT TO MY HOUSE AND STUDIO .......
CAN YOU BELIEVE I WAS CRINGING?
Postscript from Facebook:
IT TAKES A LOT OF PRACTICE AND LIVE PERFORMANCE TO GET INTO THE ENERGETIC CONFIDENT EXUBERANT STATE OF MIND THAT IS NECESSARY TO GET UP IN FRONT OF AN AUDIENCE AND PLAY.
I HAVE HAD TO WORK MY WAY UP TO THAT GLORIOUS STATE FROM LAYING THERE UNABLE TO MOVE TO DANCE AND WAIL WITH MY HARMONICAS.
IT COULD TAKE ONLY A SINGLE BAD EXPERIENCE TO MAKE ME CRINGE AND TO BE UNABLE TO PERFORM OR EVEN TO LEAVE THE HOUSE DUE TO A RELAPSE INTO SHELL SHOCK OR TONIC IMMOBILITY.
