LIVE ROCK CRITIC

Saturday Night Live March 12th 2011                          

Jessie J. Very entertaining. The band was tight balanced and energetic. Jessie wore her costumes out classing the lady G's excess without sacrificing shownanship.

I liked the fast moving horns and bass. The Saturday Night live Band did not resort to the tired old taking solos. The whole band worked together to create musical highlights.

Timing was right on, the tastefully short precise and explosive dance moves were executed in six inch heels.

                                                                              
During Saturday Night skits, without really trying, I noticed three instances of missed lines. The highly rehearsed Jessie J and the band drew a sharp contrast performing without error.

The formula money bling cars lyrics were clearly audible and dynamic and I am sure the words were exactly what today's young audience wanted to hear.

I am partial to rock and I am unmoved by most Rap. B.O.B's Rap clap trap.I simply do not get it, when the band swells and the vocal kicks up after the rap is over its thrilling and dynamic but Rap, I don't know, I didn't like it.

Jessie J, so tall and the base player and the man with the nice Black Beauty Les Paul, so small. Very theatrical. Saturday Night Live is the theatre.

                                                                            

The second number was a stabbing Jazz. J's moves were snaky and the stripy legs right for the dance. The guitarists changed to his Stratocaster and I could hear the tenor Fender highs right in for the tune. The bass player was so excited. The horns and the saxophone and the organ carried the soundbed really smoothly. The drummer was precise and unobtrusive.

LIVE ROCK CRITIC ONE

Saturday Night Live March 5th 2011: The Strokes have had the luck of the New Yorkers. They are my first critique.

                                                                              
E. Herr venerates the Strokes as portraying New York. Yes, grey unenthusiastic desultory confused with cool. I thought I'd check for great videos before I cut loose and I am ready to do it.

Julian Casablancas vocalist and his "how about that". My God, what misplaced enthusiasm. Lacking power range rhythm and tonality, Casablancas constantly droned away incomprehensibly but very obviously out of tune.

                                                                               
All through the moaning One Range Jane vocal droned on, Casablanca's choking the microphone and singing into his hand.I honestly thought these were neophytes with stage fright.I thought these guys wish they were some where else instead of unprepared and insipid on Saturday Night Live.

I made out the one word "Nightmare" oh well, English is probably not Casablanca's first language.
At the end he pretended to shoot himself in the face.

Disparate from each other the different themes and riffs floated together like pots and pans in a sink full of Casablanca's dishwater.

Granted I should cut them some slack they were obviously travel worn and grimy from being in storage.They didn't practice. Got hammered last night. And they are freaked. I stopped the PVR and looked into Casablanca's eyes. Freaked.

Looking absolutely freaked bass player Nikolai Fraiture sucked in his cheeks while displaying a jaunty burst of underarm hair from time to time as he swayed so his wooden arms could move around on the wooden base neck. Its hard but Fraiture managed to play a powerless meandering bass.

                                                                              
Minimilist Fabrizio Moretti's tapped and thumped  in the background, he smiled at himself, happy it seemed with the unsyncopated unpunctuated swamp of weak drum sounds clashing lightly with the mix master dissonance of the band and the even more alien and obscure vocal.

Albert Hammond and Nick Valensi the guitarists twanged strummed and wanked through the two songs and most pathetically soloed. The Valensi solo in the first song, the last guitar solo fell flat on its face.

You probably noticed I have not said much about the music, the overall production. Right. What should I say mediocre is OK if its Saturday Night Live?